CLAP CLAP Ward Barnes!

CLAP CLAP WARD: Write us an inspiring novel about your life...

Firstly I reckon I am requesting some grace from Linds/Moni for my tardiness in the response to your queries. Secondly I miss both of you and want to see y'all soon. As y'all know I graduated from South Carolina last summer. I then moved home (really tough time-weak.) and worked at a running store in Atlanta called Phidippides. I was pretty miserable at home and really wanted to do something fun. So I talked to my buddy Gabe Temple who worked at a Young Life camp in Colorado called Frontier for the previous year. He encouraged me to maybe look into some internships with some Young Life camps especially in Colorado. So I did and I discovered that a Young Life family camp called Trail West was hiring interns for a seasonal four month long internship. I applied and the head of the internship program, Bill Butler, called me back and informed me that all their positions were full, but he would keep me in mind for the following Summer internship season. At that point I thought the Lord was closing that door on my life and started searching for what may be next. A couple of weeks later I was filling up my truck at a Shell station right next to the Starbucks at the corner of Paper Mill and Johnson Ferry and Bill called me and said that they had a lot of people back out of the internship and was wondering if I would still be interested. I felt such a peace about it I committed right there. So n January 16 my Daddy and I headed out to drive to Colorado from Atlanta. The four months I spent at Trail West were great. In so many ways; I met incredible people and formed some friendships that I hope will last a lifetime (including with William Izlar -an Auburn Beta/YL leader you might know Moni), I also went bull-riding several times and ended up breaking my arm from getting caught in the rope for a few seconds-still wearing the cast but worth it, went skiing quite often, and loved just living in the beautiful Colorado rockies. It was an incredibly tough internship- most days were ten to fourteen hours of manual labor. Being the only YL family camp Trail West is unique in many ways. Primarily because it has hotel style accommodations- which means it's pretty much one huge lodge. I scrubbed toilets, made beds and served meals for my four months. We were basically the "tawashes", and "work crew" for those associated with Young Life nomenclature or slaves as we referred to ourselves. We made minimum wage and had really basic housing. But the biggest thing I learned from my time out there was the lessons the Lord taught me. I was at a place where I was really questioning the Lord's role in my life and heart. I didn't know what I was supposed to "do" after I graduated. I still don't know my "career" and before when I was living at home I kind of blamed God for not giving me a clear schedule for my life and career path. He in turn took me out of that situation to teach me something incredible which was simply to trust him. Where I had placed my importance on things of this world God reminded me to place my importance on Him. He robbed me of my daily self centered thoughts and when little self righteous motions had been coming forefront in my mind so frequently in those fall months- God stripped me of all my self-reliance. My relationship grew so much with the Lord that I needed him- constantly. The old hymn "I need Thee every hour" became my montra, and war cry out there- Jars of Clay does a great version of it if you want to check it out. Where I had placed importance on relationships with people and worldly respect, God taught and showed me to rely on Him, and trust. I realized it was okay to have goals for the future- but when you give your heart and life to Christ you give everything. Where I had been holding on to a few things that I simply knew I would have in the future (i.e. : a family, a house in the South, a nice job, respect, etc.) Christ said If anyone would come after me, he must deny himself and take up his cross and follow me. Cling to nothing-hope in nothing but the Lord. That is what I learned at Trail West and I hope I can keep that in the forefront of my mind. I went to church just two times went I was at home in the fall working at Phidippides bc I was struggling with the Lord so much and what to do in my life. Both times I went I left in tears from the Lord working on my heart. I'll close with one of those times- I went and just sat in the top walking balcony in the activities center for a baptism service. I saw Chris Anderson's father get baptized. During his baptism Mr. Wright explained Mr. Anderson's reason for getting baptized- his wife (Chris's Mom) had passed away fairly recently and having never been baptized he wanted to express to the congregation that even during this time of sorrow and grief his hope was still firmly rooted in the Lord. I broke down then- here I was living such a blessed life and just complaining about not knowing what to do and blaming God for it- and here was Mr. Anderson fully trusting the Lord's will in a time of such tragedy. My word of encouragement/challenge would be to see where y'all are holding on to things in your life that you aren't really willing to give to the Lord- be it a job- a future- or anything. Miss y'all hope all is well. Love.